That hair, it just keeps growing. And it's staying pretty blonde, so far. In the sun, Mike says it sparkles like amber. Pretty poetic!
A friend gave me this infinity scarf for my nursing graduation. It's really fun, but I'm undecided on how to wear it - unlooped seems best, the double loop feels quite Elizabethan, which inspired this shot:
Happily, it's spring and the weather is all over the place, AND I have occasional hot flashes, so I don't really have to decide. I just switch between one loop, two, or none, depending on my personal temperature.
On to more thoughtful thoughts...
I think I mentioned
in one of my original posts that a good friend of mine, who’s not plugged in to
social media, asked why people blog. I suppose we hope many someones out there
want to know what we’re thinking about, which, when you say it like that,
sounds incredibly narcissistic. Well, we ARE Americans. ;) But I’m kinda
counter-culture, so I’m not comfortable with that answer, and I’ve been mulling
it over as I explore the world of blogging.
Personally, I blog
because I like other blogs so much. I love it when my friends blog because I
learn so much about their lives and thoughts that I might not know otherwise.
I’m finding that blogs help me get to know my friends better because we often
share things in writing that are hard to reach in everyday conversations. As a
cancer survivor and as a new nurse, I’ve discovered and been inspired,
encouraged, and entertained by strangers’ blogs, too. My latest favorite is by
a woman in Minneapolis who is going through prophylactic mastectomies:
GreaterThanTheSumOfMyParts.wordpress.com. Great title, right?
I also blog because
writing has always been something I enjoy, and it is infinitely easier for me
to express myself on paper than out loud. It’s open-to-the-public journaling,
which, while a bit scary, will hopefully enrich someone else. But if I’m the
only one who reads it, I’m totally fine with that, too. Soon after my cancer
diagnosis, I started using CarePages to keep everyone updated. In addition to
easing the burden of communicating with lots of people, blogging was a helpful
way to process my diagnosis and treatment.
As I blogged my way
through a year of cancer, I was overwhelmed and puzzled by frequent compliments
about how well I was handling everything. Honestly, I didn’t have any other
viable option for proceeding – relying on God’s strength and promises and
counting my blessings seemed like the only acceptable and sensible way to move
forward. Now I’m watching a good friend navigate the same path, and I’m in awe
of her positive coping and how she does a much better job than I did at giving
glory to God through her journey. Today I told her she not only inspires me,
but lets me know that I’m not the only one who sees the blessing in having
cancer – if I’m crazy for thinking that, at least I’ve got some great company!
As I read my
friend’s CarePages posts and think about why I’m falling in love with blogging,
I realize that maybe it’s not the cancer that brings out our faith and spurs
all those marveling compliments. Instead, it’s just that we don’t do a good job
of expressing our faith and our thanksgiving in our daily, normal lives. Cancer
definitely enriched my faith, but it didn’t create my faith, it just gave me a
platform to express it. I had a really big situation in which to live out my
faith, and lots of people were watching and listening because they were
concerned about me.
Outside of cancer,
my faith – my identity in Christ - is the same, but the stakes aren’t as high,
and we don’t have time – or it feels funny – to go deeper in our conversations.
For example, I joke that my dishwasher has been working on a wing and a prayer
for the past several years. But I don’t progress to a more serious
conversation, which would reveal that I really DO pray occasionally that the
dishwasher will last until we have the money to replace it. I would also say I
believe God cares about little things like my dishwasher and has a hand in
keeping it functioning. I wouldn’t go so far as to call it a miracle, but one
button that didn’t work unless I slammed the door closed several times suddenly
started working on the first try, without the dramatic slamming. Finally, I
would tell you that most of the time I can overlook the bottom panel, which
insists on being askew despite many efforts, some involving duct tape, to fix
it. "Excuse me, your wires and insulation are showing…" There’s definitely a
little grace from God that helps me ignore that.
Please, if you like
to write, go forth and blog! And tell me about it, so I can get to know you
better.
In other miniscule
news, my husband just proclaimed that it’s time for lights out and he turned
off my light using the switch by our bedroom door. It’s one of those lights
with two switches. I let a lot of things go (that’s the grace of God, changing
me from an uptight Type A to a relaxed Type B personality), but it really bugs
me when the light is out and the switch is UP! That’s just wrong. In a heroic
expression of love, my husband turned the light back on and went across the
room to use the “right” light switch, even though he thinks it’s ridiculous
that I’m so bothered by this little detail. He’s definitely a keeper. <3
